Jeff

The 8-Shaded Rainbow – Part 14

I am yawning nonstop and practically ready for bed but my brain swirls like a blizzard as if I just woke up.  For a moment, I wished I could walk up side down on my head so that I can tire off my brain as much I do my feet on unending walks every day.  It gets me frustrated when physically I am this exhausted already while my mind has a life of its own, wanting to do surgery at the same time when my body is dead and the surroundings is pitch black.

Now, what do I do?  Not that much I reckon, considering all I got is a wide-awake head on top of an immovable body – except of course my very able hands tipping and tapping above the keyboard.  Thank goodness!

Recently, the thought of the “true colours” in my rainbow of life has somehow claimed residency in my head - the realization that those hues shouldn’t come spontaneously and quick made so much sense; the very same principle which applies to coming and going of way too many different individuals in our lives as we live day by day.  How so very foolish of me to deliberately paint my perfect rainbow instantly without anticipating the occurrence of rainstorms and sunshine on random days; how so very foolish of me indeed to think that a rainbow is forever; and where have I painted it?  Right in the middle of my idealisms and perspectives that only I can see.  I made up my own fantasyland while the truth is hidden somewhere behind.

The truth is, life isn’t always a beautiful sight like a rainbow is; certainly not a bed of roses.  And just like how colourful that rainbow could possibly be, it isn’t something constant; not only that it fades, it disappears too.

Many new acquaintances I have made this past few months.  Some became rather close to my heart like Jeff; some remained acquaintances.  Jeff from the article I have written about him and was published shortly after that became very close to me.  Jeff is gay.  We have known each other shortly after he arrived in Canada and although we were not instant friends, I know in my heart that we will be, soon enough.  Before we knew it, we were shaking our booties off together on the dance floor and downing bottles of tequila too.  From punch lines to unexplainable wackiness, we just click.  Our friendship intensified when he, unconditionally and lovingly held me up during my involvement with Adam and Janelle on that ugly issue.  It even deepened so much more when just a month ago, Jeff is caught by the Immigration Officers while working somewhere else rather than the place where his working permit states. 

Jeff came over to Canada with a Caregiver working visa.  Well, not at all that it was the real case though.  It was a set-up.  He was sponsored by a relative with the job description of a Caregiver, so that he may acquire a permanent residency ticket in two years, but he is made to work as a cook in the restaurant business of his relatives.  Jeff, thinking this is his only way out, agreed and was therefore, reporting for work as a cook as opposed to being a Caregiver, in a totally different working place.  It has been like that since September of last year.  Everything was A-okay, until that fateful day in early March of this year.  Two big guys, tall, wearing black suit and white undershirt with dark shades (I am imagining the Men in Black outfit here as Jeff described them to me) march in rather harshly to the restaurant and asked for Jeff.  My poor friend, came out of the kitchen, apron on and all, clueless and everything; the interrogation started that instant.  Jeff was cornered.  He was terrified and crumbled like a wilted lettuce.  After the frightful questioning and threatening, he was sent home to his working address right away.  He called me home as soon as he got there and that’s how I knew of it. 

 

At that moment, I cried so much (but not entirely about Jeff’s troubles) because it was about the very same time when some sad news from home reached me.  I was like, what kind of practical joke is this?  How come it hurts so badly?  So many sad things happened and made to fit in all in one day as if there is no tomorrow anymore.  I was almost on the verge of losing my mind.  I was numb all over.  I feel so sorry for my brother back home and then here’s Jeff, with a great possibility to be deported. 

Nothing I can really do at that time.  I vowed to pray so much more and surrender my sorrows to Him.  I myself, crumbled too.  And while I am battling with my personal issues, I have to keep myself together.  Wear the bravest face I could manage, stabilize my shaky knees and stand up no matter what the odds maybe.  I still couldn’t find the courage to speak of my struggles though, I hope one day, I’d be strong enough to share it with you all.  Meantime, I have to at least smile and be there for Jeff. 

We celebrated Jeff’s birthday amidst the thought that any day, a letter of deportation may arrive in his mailbox.  I made personalized pieces of birthday greetings for him and I put it together to make a birthday banner.  Jeff gave me a tight embrace for that; I baked a chocolate cake and have it designed personally.  Jeff gave me another hug for that.  I know that Jeff has a lot of other people around showing him support and love, and I wanted to tell him in my own little way that I am one of them.  I wanted to cheer him up and forget his sorrows even just for a while.  The party actually turned out to be so much fun.  Noreen was there, Janelle (yes, she was there and I have to civil with her), Grace and Maya.   I couldn’t be any happier looking at Jeff, laughing and being gay.  I have found a real friendship in him.  He confides everything to me; his ordeal with the dirt-cheap pay he is getting with all the hard work; he tells me how he loves his family back home and I somehow can feel it; he introduced me as his “closest friend” to his now partner, Darren.  He makes me feel that I am somehow, truly a part of his life.  Now all I am hoping and praying for is that, this friendship stands the test of time.  Who knows?  Jeff might as well be one hue, meant to stay forever in my rainbow of life.

I am doing the Baby Shower party decor for Jeff’s soon-to-pop-out nephew.  And while we don’t see each other that much these days; and I miss his cooking because he needs to stay home in the city and do the Caregiver Job, I couldn’t wait to see Jeff tomorrow on the Baby Shower.  I am sure we have lots to catch up on and giggle about again, as if we don’t chat every day!

To this day, we are still anxiously waiting for the verdict.  Although in my mind, I am most certain that our conjoined prayers were heard of by the Lord Almighty. (Even my own problems back home in the Philippines has subdued.)  In my heart, I believe Jeff’s case turned itself way around the bend; a miracle that has happened to this person well-worthy of a second chance. (And so is my brother.)